To Chengdu or Not?

Never in my wildest dreams, I ever thought I will ever become a housewife. Not when I have a good degree, and not when I am young with no kids. This topic has been joked about in uni days, and i remembered my comment, "Wah..must hang my degree in the kitchen, should i become one".

And one, I might become. This idea has been in my mind for the past few days, especially since i send hubby off on monday. It's another year of living apart AGAIN. No one to do grocery shopping with, no one to watch movie with, no one to share household chores (argh....) and most importantly, no one to hear my disgruntled complaints from a hard day of work.

The worst part is, friends and relatives will volunteer their horror stories of who they heard went astray in china, never sparing a thought of how i would feel. F***. Fortunatetly, i have alot of trust in my H and so far survived our one year apart.

Not that i am unwilling to relocate, but i am few months into my new job and it's a rather interesting position, in a very comfortable environment, drawing a decent pay and good bonus. What to do if i go over? I tried spending 2 weeks there and had nothing to do except watch tv , shopping, tv, shopping and tv. I think my brain will turn to mashmallow by the time i come home for good.

Ar..considering my current job no point to give up if H is coming back end of the year. However that was what i thought last year, now he is extending his contract for another year, and another year could be another and another before we realised that someone ought to make a decision to go or to come back.

Tough decision.. but one that I have to make sooner or later. Big sigh..